Racism or Distancing, Post MLK Day 2010

During a wide ranging conversation some days back with a few white friends spurred by our past Martin Luther King Holiday, an interesting comment was made. When we were talking about the Civil Rights Movement here in the United States, and the time that has since passed, one person thought that some minority groups still believe they are inferior.

I thought that was a funny observation, but after the conversation ran its course, I understood how and why the comment was formed. It is possible many who feel this way will take those beliefs feelings to their graves. We can make speeches, conduct marches, hold rallies, and pass laws. What we can not do is change the mindset of people most affected by these limiting beliefs.

It is my understanding that Share Cropping was ‘created’ when it became obvious that newly freed slaves were not emotionally or financially equipped to leave their old lives behind and go out into a mostly foreign world and create new lives. Newly freed Americans who knew little or nothing of life as independent persons. People who could go anywhere and do anything, did what most of us would do in the same situation. They reached out for the closest life to life before emancipation. It was a bad choice with little chance of success, but it was comfortable.

For any people having family members who were once not free to make their own choices about their lives, is a hard to understand those choices. For some people whose forbearers lived in those circumstances, life today is not too far removed from those times in their minds eye. Some of the older people alive today have almost firsthand knowledge of what life was like in those days. They were raised with limiting thoughts and feelings around them each and every moment. They were or are people not to likely to change their thinking.

Some more recent peoples coming to the United States feel as if they are shut out of main stream culture for other reasons. They may feel others think they are not ‘American’ enough by the standards of those around them. Some over compensate by going overboard on American culture. Others live deep within their old culture, or whatever adaptations of it exist around them in the United States. Others do their best to become part of American Mainstream as best they can.

Living apart from what some non-white Americans perceive as American Mainstream Culture, from my perspective is their view of American Mainstream culture does not exist anywhere other than the eyes of the beholder. American Mainstream, sometimes thought of as  ‘White Culture’ as some view it, is no more a cohesive group than people living above the Arctic circle with those living in the Amazon Rain Forests. Religion, perception, politics, nationality, and economics continue to fracture and reinvent the American Mainstream.

Not being outside of the ‘American Mainstream’, I can only give my impression of what it is like on the inside. I believe there is not much difference between being inside the American Mainstream and looking in at American Mainstream from a perceived outside view. Imagine living in New York, or any densely populated city with most of the population living somewhere between self sufficient and wealthy. Whatever city picked must have mass transportation as the major form of commute. Now place yourself in that population going and coming from work, shopping, and generally living in that city.

People appear to be insensitive, blunt, rude, all socially derogative behaviors one sees in a large city. That to me is a snapshot view of the American Mainstream. If you feel you are not part of the Mainstream, you probably are. If you feel like people ignore you, they probably do. If you feel that people are willing to take advantage of you, they probably do. Everything anyone considers roadblocks to joining ‘Mainstream America’ and their trying to be a part of it is likely true. Welcome to Mainstream America, you are likely experiencing life in the primordial plasma of the American Dream.

If you want to change Mainstream America, you have to get off the sidelines and join in. You can help shape the culture, thinking, and mannerisms of your community. You have to be willing to give of yourself for that to happen though. Programs all over your community need your help, and not just your money. If you don’t jump in make changes, don’t expect for change to happen. Join in and be an active part of the American Mainstream.

One Secret About You

I know a secret about you. A secret you share with many others. Maybe really a secret but something you let yourself forget. What could it be that I know, that you either don’t know or have forgotten? Something that you share with many others? Those people like you sharing a secret? What could other people also know and have forgotten?

I think it is kind of funny to me, some of the time when I look at people around me and they are wrapped up in the moment because they have forgotten. (I am that way occasionally myself. It is fun being that way for a short time, then it gets old.) Maybe people become wrapped up in the moment so they can forget? I am never sure. I doubt they give themselves permission to know the answer either.

What I know about you, that you likely do not know about yourself is probably going to make you want to quit reading as soon as I tell you. You will want to quit reading because to ponder the idea of it being true is something you may not want to think about or do. After all, you must have wanted to forget at some point and time?

I suppose I will go ahead and, “Let the cat out of the bag”. I don’t know the significance of that saying, but I have heard it since I was a child, and it seems appropriate. Or maybe I used to hear it as a child, and I do not hear it any more.  At any rate, think of the time you will save when you quit reading this post, or maybe even reading anything else from my blog because I have fallen off the log one time to many.

Here is what I know about you, that you do not know about yourself. You live a life of duality! Whether you know that, think you know that, did not know that, or maybe don’t believe it, you have a spiritual life going on, and you are very active in your spiritual life. Who you are and what you do in your spiritual life away from your earthly you, I can only guess. You will have to learn this yourself.

You do have something going on though. I am not the only one who knows this. I don’t mean you have some form of religion, and you go to church for a few minutes each week. (That is sometimes used as part of the coverup that people use to forget who they are.) You have a mission or quest you work towards continuously as your spiritual self.

Here in your earthly self you live a spiritual life. You also have at least two spirit beings who are with you every second of your life. There are what we like to call Angels, but they are not really angels in that the way we think of Angels. If you become seriously ill, you have three or more of these beings around you. If you want to know more about them, you can. You can learn for yourself, from yourself, about yourself. You are all you need to find out who and what you are, and what is around you.

You also have other beings that come close to you on occasion. Some, you may think of as allies, they want what you want. Some of these beings want to destroy you, and failing that, help you remain ignorant of who and what you really are. For the most part, the second group is succeeding. If they weren’t succeeding, you would not be reading this in disbelief. Other beings could care less about you and what you want, or don’t want, they have their own agenda and you are not part of it.

You do not have to try to attract a spirit to you, they are already around you. You are just too numb to realize they are there. If you were aware enough to realize their presence, you may find you interact with them in some form or another. You can change your earthly self thinking and know more about your spiritual self other than the occasional unexplained events that happen in your life. Or you can keep that side of yourself a secret and go one as you have.

The choice is always yours. If you choose to start to remember who you are, Pandora’s Box comes into play. Think and decide carefully. Once you lift the lid, you can never pretend you do not know.

Bad Decisions Can Hurt

I was in a conversation today when an interesting remark was made. The remark is applicable to many conversations and circumstances. Once heard I thought the remark would be applicable as a life compass to help everyone make better decisions. Decisions we find ourselves making are not always the best when we look at them after the fact. I will use driving as a simple example here too with myself as the main character.

The morning starts out bad. The power went out, the alarm clock died, I wake up late because of of the clock and the power, and because I went to bed later than I should have the night before. I start my car, and think if I drive fast to work I will make it faster than if I take my time and follow the speed limits. The time saved is really only a minute or two, and the speed limits are fast enough. That is reasonable thinking although I am not thinking reasonably at the moment.

I am almost to wherever I am going, and suddenly there is a police car behind me with red lights flashing. The Policeman has done his duty, no slacking off for him, and I am looking at a hefty fine. Checking my watch I see I have lost ten minutes when I only was two minutes ahead anyway. Now there is the matter of my insurance company finding out, and depending on what I do for a living, the company I work for.

Getting to work in thirty-two minutes late instead of thirty-six minutes late is not a life changing event. A speeding ticket in in and of itself is not a major life changing situation. Hitting another car, and injuring the other driver, or running over someone crossing the street because I was racing along, would be a life changing event I would live with the rest of my life.

The issue of abortion for example; in the thinking of some people is getting the abortion is not the whole issue. What is the whole issue, is the behavior that led up to getting pregnant in the first place. Why would anyone get pregnant with someone they do not wish to have a baby with? Why was someone having unprotected sex if they did not wish to be pregnant in the first place?

Pregnancy and abortion are trigger words for high profile articles, and are used here to point out a thinking flaw most of us tend to share at one time or another in our lives. We find ourselves taking an action even though we dread one of the possible outcomes. We somehow prevent ourselves, or downplay that outcome while we are making the decision.

If you have not guessed by now the remark, and I bet you thought I forgot about it and went off on a tangent, was a word picture about getting pregnant when not planning to, by someone you do not want a baby with. The actual wording is of little importance, but the idea behind it should be on the top of everyones decision making list.

As I thought about what was said, I saw another ‘Rule of Three’ in the making.

What are the worst possible outcomes within reason?

Is the best outcome worth the risk of the worst outcome(s) actually happening?

How seriously will the outcomes you do not want, if they happen change your life?

When looked at through those three lenses, what seems like a good idea at the moment is not worth the risk of what could happen if something goes wrong. If something goes wrong, looking at yourself in the mirror every day, knowing a poor choice you made, because you can not make it right, is the real painful result. Who wants to wake every day knowing it easily could have been a different choice if only?

February Carp Fishing

It was a beautiful day here in Albuquerque, and I decided I would take advantage of it and do some Carp fishing. Of course beautiful days are relative and this one was no exception. It was going to be sixty degrees Fahrenheit in town and forty-eight degrees Fahrenheit up in Sante Fe.  I was going almost two-thirds of the way to Sante Fe.

I am not sure what the temperature was at the lake, but warm it was not. There was a steady cold breeze with some gusting. The lake is popular with sailboaters because of the winds. The wind was frigid coming off the surrounding mountains which still have snow on them.

I only had a few hours to fish, as it takes most of the morning to warm up, and  it starts cooling off quickly towards sunset. Even though it is winter, the lake was free of ice except for one point about one-half mile away which seemed to be holding the remaining ice on the lake.

I was not sure I would catch any Carp, as they tend to move to deeper water in cold weather. I used a basic setup. I had a light sliding egg shape weight, swivel, about eighteen inches of leader and a number six Salmon egg hook. I used whole kernel corn for bait.

Most of the corn went into the lake for chum. If you chum for Carp, ensure chumming for Carp is legal before you try it. I only held back a small handful to use on my hook. A car pulled up with a man and women in it. The woman walked off to look at the dock and the man came to where I was and we chatted.

He was recently from California, and was familiar with the Mammoth Lakes area where I lived for a few years. He was an avid fisherman too, I could tell because he brought up some of the places I used to fish at while living in Mammoth Lakes. He is also a Carp fisherman. I thought this was unusual because he talked on some about Ocean fishing.

The Man said he took up Carp fishing a few years back. I knew he was a dyed in the wool fisherman because one of his Carp grew five pounds over the telling of his story. Or maybe I was a little envious of the story. He was telling me about a big Carp he landed on Ultra Light tackle and six pound test line. I could see in my mind what a battle that must have been. Using ultra light tackle and hooking a big fish!

A few minutes later, he left because he was cold. The rest of the hour was uneventful, and I thought I was wasting my time. Thirty more minutes and I was sure I was wasting my time. I put on more clothes to warm up. Getting warmer, I was getting sleepy, or maybe it was the lazy day at the lake. One impatient soul showed up with his sailboat. I guess he could not wait for spring either. I lazily watched him launch and get his sails up on a cold day.

I started to nod off as there were no more distractions other than wind humming in one ear. The sun was warm, and my chair was comfortable. A few seconds later, off in the distance I heard a clicking sound. I have two baitrunner reels and the sound came through the fog of almost sleep. I opened my eyes and one of rods was twitching opposite of the wind!

It seemed only an instant and I was standing holding my rod, and releasing the bait runner drag, ready to see if I actually had a Carp on. The line tightened and my rod bent. I wish I could say it was glorious fight. In very cold water fish are sluggish, and this Carp was no exception. It gave its best fight, but nothing like I would have had in the middle of summer.

I landed a nice, very bronze sided Carp of about twenty-five inches. Unfortunately, it was on the hungry side, and not carrying a lot of weight. Not unusual for this lake, as there is not enough food to grow heavy fish in this water. Catching one Carp had me wide awake and ready for more. Unfortunately, one Carp was my fishing excitement for the day.

It was a good fishing day. I know as spring creeps up and I can not resist the urge any longer, there may be at least one hungry Carp waiting for an irresistible piece of corn, or a little dough ball of homemade something to snack on.

Feeling Lost in Your Spiritual Life?

I have some posts that may help you if you find yourself not sure where your life is going, or where it should be going. These posts may be what you are looking for?

Feeling Lost Because You Are

Accept or Change your Life

Want More Out of Your Life

Feeling Lost In Your Own Life

Life Plan 101

If you are looking for general help with your life, one or more of these posts will help you get your life where you want it to be. One thing I have never touched on in these posts is feeling spiritually lost in your religious life. I wrote a post called: Dark Night of the Soul, an overview about going through the process of finding ones spiritual self, mainly through ego destruction you may be interested in.

An area I glossed over about until now, is feeling lost in your spiritual life from a Christian perspective. Feeling spiritually lost happens easily. With so many people telling you how, and what to believe it gets very confusing. What makes it more confusing is they all come on like midway Carnies at the County Fair. Step right up folks, I have what you are looking for. If this is why you are reading this post looking for an answer, perhaps this is a good post to find direction for problems of this type.

At first the new church is fun, then the finish starts to tarnish and the cracks start to show. At some point listening to what they say, it becomes apparent, this is the same song with a different melody.

Instead how about reading one thought what is important to being a Christian? The central theme of being a Christian is not about being pure or donating money. It is not about volunteering to clean your church. Those are important things, and should not be ignored, but are not one of the best reasons for being a Christian.

If you are or wish to be a Christian, the one fundamental reason you want to be a Christian is because you believe there is a God who is good and just. Because you know and accept there is a God, you also must accept that there is an anti-God named Satan who is the opposite of God.

That is what you should know before you consider anything else about being a Christian of any type. Knowing this, and keeping it forefront in your religious thinking is why you are living this moment as a Christian. Everything else in your life is secondary. Christian churches may merge or disappear. You may change churches yearly, or decide not to go to church at all. One day a fire might wipe out the building that was your church.

You are a Christian because for all your life there has been war fought between good and evil. Like it or not, you are a very important part of that war. You may not feel like you are a good Christian or a Soldier. You do not hear any gun shots, see any bombed out building, or dead bodies laying in the streets.

The war going on is for this world, and you must believe this above everything else about being a Christian. If you think there is no war, think about the poorest sections of your city. The gangs, drugs, the violence, and the hate. The burglaries, car thefts, and violent acts around you. You are a Soldier in this ongoing, never ending battle.

You think you are not any of these labels. Your friends are not any of these labels. Chances are your family do not fit any of these labels. So why are those other people, like you, but across the street or across town so destructive? Because of the battle for this world. Whether they actively chose sides, or are ignorant of their actions, they are part of the war. If they are the gang members, drug dealers, pimps, thieves, etc, they are not on your side of the war.

I am not a fan of preaching, and this sounds awfully preachy to me so that is all I will say about it. If you have not known before, now you know why you are a Christian. You were created to fight in the war. Everything else is in life is secondary to the battle.

What you do or do not do, and whether you are successful or poor is not important in the spiritual world. The only thing that matter is you do what you know is right for yourself, friends and family, neighborhood, and city. That is how you do battle in this war. The balance constantly shifts. We move closer to, and then a step away from destroying ourselves, and the earth.

Now you know why, and what you should be doing. When you get to the other end of your life, the question, ‘Did you do your part to make the world a better place by resisting evil?’, is the only question that matters. Sometimes answers come from surprising sources.

Young Woman’s Small Resource

It may seem kind of funny coming from a Man who was a teenager when the Viet Nam war was happening. I have some advice for young women. Having survived the male side of teenage life, growing into adulthood, and now talking about Grandkids, I may have a few thoughts you may want to take time to read. You may have heard it all before, but give me a few minutes anyway? You have a lot more time ahead of you than I do.

Somebody has to be something. You can decide what something is. Someone has to be everything you are thinking about. It does not matter who is what, or how you fit in. It is not important if you are not the prettiest, funniest, or best dressed. A few years from now these things won’t matter to you very much. The only thing that really matters is you like the young woman you see in the mirror.

You are in such a rush to look older. Companies are stealing from you. Helping you look ten, fifteen, possibly twenty years older than you are is theft. Take a minute or two and look at the older women shopping the same cosmetic aisles you are next time you are shopping. You know what older women want? They want to look like you without makeup! It is true, I guarantee it! A few of the women standing in the aisle with you have already wasted thousands of dollars trying to look as young as you. You will never look this young again, so don’t hide yourself with makeup you do not need. Perfect faces are for fantasies.

No matter what you do, you can only do so much with the body your parents gave you. Take care of your body by eating right, getting good exercise, plenty of sleep, and don’t worry about things you can not do anything about, which is about everything you worry about.

Most young men have two heads until they are in they reach their early thirties. Around thirty something, they start to think more often with the one their shoulders. No matter what a young man tells you, or how he makes you feel, he wants sex; and not a lot else from you. This is the way we men are made. We do not have deep emotions when we are young.

He will make you laugh, buy you trinkets, and spend time with you. All he really wants is sex. I imagine you do not believe this is true, especially if some young man is doing all the things for you I just mentioned. He will tell you this is not true. Which of his two heads do you think is thinking with?

I offer you a challenge if you do not believe me. Go to Walmart, or your favorite large discount store for an hour or so. Look for young women with small children in tow. As you find them, look at them closely. How are they dressed. Do they look happy? Look at their left hand and see if they are married. Most of those women believed what some young man told them because he made them feel good. He’s now long gone, and a dim memory.

It is hard to know what life will be for you. If you make good decisions, you have a better chance of it being a good life. You will find work you really want to do. You will have fun with your friends, do new things, go on dates, see new places, eat new foods. In general you will have fun.

Your life will slowly evolve. What other people think of you will become less important. You will start to learn about yourself. You will figure out you really are not feeling lonely for some guy. No man will complete you. You are feeling distanced from something you can’t define. If you a observant, you will notice others around you feel this way too. You will see it in them when they are not wearing their public face. Being married, having children, or having a serious relationship does not make this feeling go away for long.

Eventually when you are not paying attention, someone will slip up on you. You hopefully will fall in love, get married and start a family. If you married for reasons that go deeper than he has cute dimples, or he’s good in bed, your marriage has a chance of surviving more than a few years.

On the other hand, if you let your emotions run your life, and believe what young men are telling you, your life will be a little different. Go to Walmart again and look at the miserable, single, poor young women with children, trying to make ends meet on a Friday night at Walmart that you saw. Soon you will be one of them.

You want to make good choices based on reality, not emotions, what your friends are saying, or what some guy is telling you. You are my future, and I want your future to be one filled with happy adults who know what is important in their life. Happy adults have happy children. Happy children need all the help they can get, so they too make good decisions.