For different reasons we all at one point or another find our lives crumbling around us.  What we do or do not when our life starts to crumble makes a huge difference on how fast we bounce back from our life falling apart. Sometimes we should react quickly, other times we should barely react at all.

Some of us spend a lot of energy trying to patch our lives back together and try to make it what it was before. Others feel relief at their lives falling apart and good riddance to their old life. Most of us rarely try to manage the transition our lives are go through from one state to the other.

As we live, our life is always in a state of transition. If you have small children it may seem your day to day life is one of juggling events and activities and trying to find time for yourself in the process. If you do not have children in your life, your days may filled with different activities that require your attention. Some of us fill our lives with drama, others strive for peace and quiet. Rarely though do our lives remain the same over time.

How we manage our day to day affairs makes a big difference in how we manage when our lives are starting to fall apart. If we manage through emotion then emotional ups and downs are the norm. If we manage life with some end point in mind, all our decisions are made with that final goal in mind, and the transition to a new life is generally much smoother and stress free.

Too many of us spend enormous amounts of energy trying to keep our lives what they were before our life started falling apart. Most of us do not want anything in our life to change and we struggle to keep things the same. While our intentions are the best, the only real thing we can manage is ourselves and how we choose to act during a life transition.

Occasionally we are blindsided. We come home one day to find our marriage is no more. Our home has burned down, or someone very close to us that we depend on has passed on. Events such as these are very high on the life changing scale, and are not every day situations. When these events happen, we should not let them destroy us.

Upon the knowing of what is our new reality, what we need to do first is make only those decisions that absolutely need to be made. They are not decisions we wish to make, but they have to be made. Usually we find we will be making decisions based on very little life experience. When this happens these crucial and critical decisions have to be made all the same. Gather up whatever information is available and make the best possible decision that can be made while trying to keep emotion out of the process.

Once those crucial few decisions that can not be put off are made, stop and take inventory of your life. As difficult as it may be, place your emotions aside as much as possible and take inventory of the situation. Look for strengths which can be called upon, what assets are available, and what the long term desired outcome is.

Though it my be difficult to not do, lesser decisions should only be made with an end state or end point in mind. Determine a future time, whether it be a month, six months or a year. Decide what life should be at that point. Use that decision as a basis of all more minor decisions.

Each decision will bring one closer or farther from a desired future state. Making more decisions that move towards that desired state rather than away from it, makes getting there a lot easier.  Life altering changes changes can be difficult. Making life sized Decisions without thinking about the results will only make ones life more difficult than it has to be.

If ever, or perhaps when your life starts to crumble around you, follow these three simple steps.

• Decide what you want your life to be in six months to a year
• Make decisions to help you move your life in that direction
• Do not be afraid of accepting challenges along the way

Change is hard, and challenges are part of life. Both can be made easier with a goal in mind for where you want your life to be in the future.