Unless we can somehow erase our memories, we never let go of whatever it is we want to let go of. I snuck that thought in rather quickly so let me repeat it. We do not have the ability, any of us, to Let Go, nor do we have the ability to make person another Let Go.
If letting go were a simple process, we would never remember a skinned knee, smashed finger, or sore body part. If we hurt ourselves, we would pause, perform some simple ritual, and everything would be better. Fortunately for us, not letting go is a survival technique inherent in all of us.
What we do instead when we, Let Go, is we assimilate this present pain into us. We make it a part of us. We absorb it into ourselves. We take this pain inside of us and we mix it in with all our memories. We mingle and rationalize our present pain and emotion until we begin to feel a lessening of our pain.
We can go to others for help, though they can not really help us in the normal way we think of helping. We each have all the help we need inside us. What we need to do is decide we are ready to move on. At this moment when we decide to move on, our situation and our pain starts to change.
Generally whatever happened is the absolute worst thing we have ever experienced and it comes with the most pain we have ever experienced. Eventually we know we have to make a decision about our misery. Either we spend the rest of our life living in the moment of the pain, or we decide to start living our life again.
If we decide to start living our life again, we can see the pain for what it really is. The emotional pain we feel is a part of our life. Our pain is the result of our personal life experience. Our pain has happened and nothing we can do will ever make it disappear.
What we can do is stop thinking about hoe we feel, and start thinking about the events that led up to why we feel this way. What happened that was in our control and what happened that was beyond our control.
Whatever was in our control, we can ensure we do not do a repeat. By doing a repeat, I do not mean stop dating because this time it hurt so bad. Rather, slow down and think about what happened before. Were their signals the other person was giving off we chose to ignore? Did we emotionally invest more than we should have? Did we choose not to see the situation for what it was, and chose to create our own version instead?
It may well be there was nothing that could have been changed. It happens, and it is painful. It is also a part of life, and we can not quit living because we are hurt. Everyone of us is vulnerable because we are living our life the best we know how. Most pain of this type is a one time occurrence. It happened and it will never happen again.
If these situations are repeatable in our life, there is something we need to learn from them we are choosing to ignore. If you have one painful experience after another, perhaps it is time to change directions and not go down that path yet again. Going down a new path can be no worse than going down the same path again. If this pain is a onetime experience, accept it for what it is. Learn from it, and keep on living.
