Category Archives: Life stories

Importance of Synchronicity and You

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I know a Man who was driving home from a trip out of state. Along the way he stopped to help another Man and his Son who were broke down on the side of a back road far from the nearest town. What followed was for the Man a life changing experience.

I have another friend who was chatting to a man and passing time when the man mentioned he was looking for someone who could do some custom woodwork for his home. My friend wants to be able to make a living doing custom woodwork.

I know you are reading this post and wondering what is in it for you. What are you going to get out of this post? As I write, I am wondering the same thing. Where is this post going and how is going to end with something you can take away knowing you read something worth your time.

A few months ago, I read of a poem and some notes, Dark Night of the Soul, written by a Spanish Monk hundreds of years ago. If you have been following this blog for a while, you know I have written of The Dark Night of the Soul too. The title of the book caught my attention because when I wrote my post I had no idea the title was already in use for hundreds of years.

I bought the book, which contains a poem and extensive notes explaining the written by St. John of the Cross, who was a Carmelite friar and priest. St. John of the Cross is also considered a Mystic which is how I stumbled across his writings. I read the poem and it made complete sense to me explaining the journey of the ourselves when we are transition to something different than we were before.

After reading the poem and starting on the rest of the book, I put the book aside as I was really interested in Sufism. I first came across Sufism years ago. Sufism is unique, considered both religious and mystical, arcane knowledge is/was well known by the Sufi’s of old. It seemed everything I read said Sufi’s were familiar old forgotten knowledge. So much so it seemed Sufi’s from the past were quite familiar with Angels, and other concepts mainstream religion rarely mentions.

Remembering this thought sent me scurrying to the library to see what I might find on Sufism. There was not much, nothing was uncovered in my search of the catalogue system, though I know I am not good at searching out information this way. I went to the section on religion and there was a book by someone named Hazrat Inayat Khan titled, “The Inner Life”.

The Inner Life will not appeal to many people. If the idea of Sufism and or Spiritual Growth is something you are interested in, you may find the book a breath of fresh air. If not, you will find it filled with thoughts and proclamations that make little sense, and are foreign to how you think.

I finished, The Inner Life, or most of it as the book was due back at the library, and I decided it was not on the most checked out list, I could read the last pages sometime in the future. While I was at the library, I looked for more books on mysticism or Sufism, and came up empty handed.

That left the bookstores here in town. The selections vary, probably more from the way books are put on the shelves than the books themselves. Quality and knowledge seem to vary from book to book. While at one bookstore, I asked for help finding the section where books on Sufism would be if they had any.

There was a man at the section and he was holding two books, and looking for at least a third book. I said to the man, I was looking for a book on either Sufism, or mysticism. The man without a moments pause replied I may enjoy this book, as he reached down and removed a book from the shelf. He then said he finds the writings in this book beautiful and the words reach into both his mind and his soul. I thought that was a lot of information about how he felt about a book jammed into the ‘New Age” section which generally has a lot in common with fantasy.

As I looked down to see the book he was offering as good reading I was quite surprised. In his hand was a copy of the book, “Dark Night of the Soul, by St. John of the Cross. Somehow I was not surprised, yet at the same time I was very surprised. The man continued that he found the writing to be among the best of any books on mysticism. Written in simple words, he said the book has had a profound impact on him, and his life.

Synchronicity according to my e-dictionary is: The simultaneous occurrence of events that appear significantly related but have no discernible causal connection. If ever you were or are on a search for anything in in life, it is vital to pay attention to synchronicity as it happens. There is a Buddhist proverb (I think), “When the student is ready, the Master appears”.

For many of us, I believe synchronicity leads is to our destiny of we are aware enough to know it is happening and go with it. My friend stopping on the road, my other friend in a casual chat, and myself searching for books, each found something important and potentially life changing because of chance, or perhaps due to the action of synchronicity. Is it synchronicity that led you to this post, or is it this post which will change something in your day to take you to where you want to go and learn what you want to learn?

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Living And Learning How to Wait

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I was looking at book descriptions on the web, looking for a book to read. Doing this started me thinking of books I thought were good reads. Richard Bach’s books are among my keepers I would have if I had to limit my library to those books that made the biggest impression on me. Among his best work, and probably the simplest read is, Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

I was not sure back then what attracted me this particular book and books like it. I found Seagull so simple, yet so profound! It was a book I gave to my own children, and close friends to read. My children were almost teenagers at the time and probably could not understand why I gave them a book about a stupid Seagull trying to fly.

It is a simply written book that can be read in no time. If you are ready to hear and understand the message, the book will be with you for your lifetime, such as it is with me. I have almost all the books Richard Bach has written. I think Bach was way ahead of his time when he wrote them. Richard Bach is in love with planes and flying, so his books all have something about flying in them. All of his books are well worth a read, if you are not afraid to explore new areas of possibility.

The gist of Jonathan Livingston Seagull is never quitting, never giving up. Never quitting is written in the book on a couple of levels, both our physical and spiritual level, so the lessons apply to all areas of life. Eventually Jonathan ascends his limitations, although he has his share of problems and nay-sayer’s along the way.

waitingI have lived through some dark times. There were times when I would wonder what is the purpose of my life, and why am I going through this? Of course now, I know the reason and the answer, so it is a simple thing to look back and say to myself, it was not that bad. But it was bad of course, some days it was a matter of getting through an hour before I could look ahead to the next hour.

The biggest hope I had going for me when things were very dark was the thought that a year from that day, things could be no worse than they were at that moment. That was not a lot of consolation on one hand. On the other side of things, it was a truth of truths. The thought things could get no worse kept me going, and helped me through each day.

One day led to the next, and each day was not a lot better than the previous day. Over time I learned to accept that was just the way it was, or so it seemed. I was stubborn and refused to learn what I needed to learn from my situation, which added to my dilemma. Eventually I came out the other side, and I knew why those books were there for me all those years ago. They helped me understand that some things just take time.

Everything in life happens on its own schedule. The schedule of other things may or may not be the same as my own schedule. It may not even be close to the way I want it to happen. It is a hard lesson to know that no matter how much you want something to happen, if it happens at all, it happens on its own time.

Learning to enjoy the moment and enjoy what is happening that moment rather than what we want to be doing, or think we should be doing is one of the best things everyone can do for themselves. After all the moment we are wanting to happen may never happen in the manner we want it to, or worse yet, not happen at all. When those moments never happen at all, we may have wasted a lot of time waiting for nothing.

As much as I appreciate Jonathan Livingston Seagull, I spent a long time learning how long Jonathan had to wait.

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Hero, or Human Being?

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accident2I don’t know if he would be thought of as a hero, a good Samaritan, or a decent human being. I think what he did went well above and beyond what the average person would do. I doubt other than a few of us, her family, and the police, no one else knows what happened and his part in it.

He is not much to look at. Tall, thin, some health problems that would make most people look away, or pretend they can not see him. You know how people look avoiding looking. They would mistake him for being homeless I think; not that he gives a hoot what people think.

It happened at an intersection of course, in busy city traffic. He looked when he heard the noise, mostly because he was only a few feet away. He saw the suv rolling over, the woman who was launched from the suv, and the end result.

He was not sure how it happened, only how it ended. He told me he had some experience as a medic. I am guessing that is from serving in the military, but maybe not, as I am only guessing where he had time to pick up medical training.

The suv swerved for somehow hit the curb, and careened away rolling over. The jolt of hitting the curb threw the driver out the window, or perhaps it was through the window, he was understandably a little fuzzy on that detail. The young woman was not wearing a seat belt – probably because suv’s are ‘safe’.

Somehow, while the woman lay on the ground, the suv’s wheels turned sharply, and it went into a roll. When it stopped, upside down, the lower half of the woman’s upper body down to her feet were between the vehicle and the pavement. He told me he had seen this before, but did not elaborate. I asked if he meant like the subway trains at the terminal, and he said yes, only she was being crushed from above and not the side.

What he meant was that the lower half of the woman’s upper torso was crushed by the suv’s weight. Because of this she felt no pain, and her vital signs were almost normal down to where her abdomen disappeared under the roof. He knew from experience that when they managed to lift the vehicle off of her, the lower half of her body would be an empty sack, her blood pressure would drop to nothing, and she would die almost instantly. He knew this within seconds of running to where she was to see if he could help.

He found her conscious. He asked if she knew what happened. She did, although she said she could not feel her body from the chest down. He calmly explained that she was crushed by her vehicle, and while the vehicle was on top of her, she would feel no pain.

Next he asked her if there was anyone she wanted to call, and offered her the use of his cell phone. She was very scared and asked him to call her mother. He asked her if she wanted a priest, or someone else present with her while she waited. She asked why, and he once again explained that she was crushed under the weight of the vehicle. He did not go into more detail as he became choked up himself. He said he told her what would happen when they removed the vehicle. He spoke with the mother and explained the situation, then held the phone to the woman’s ear for her.

She spoke with her Mother for about twenty five minutes he said. She made one more call of a few minutes. He said the police, and medical people were calm, and respectful. He held her head in his lap, as they lifted the vehicle off of her. His eyes teared up again, as he told me he held her as she passed, and it was all he could do for her.

He then told me he was too shaken to drive, and had someone else drive him to his home. He said he quietly took out a bottle of whiskey, poured three fingers in a large glass, and sat down in a chair.

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Blaming the world for my poor decision

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When I was in college I used to hitchhike home some weekends. It was seventy miles one way, and split between two states. I did not mind hitchhiking so much as I was going home which beat the heck out of staying in the dorm for another weekend.

Some of the trips were okay, and some were good. The best rides I had usually came from Marine Corp recruiters. I knew when they picked me up, I would be a captive audience for a recruitment spiel that lasted as long as the Marine recruiter was heading in the direction I was going. Usually the talk ended with something along the line of, “How about you come down to the office and take our test?” Of course I respectfully declined.

Even though it was one main highway from college to the city where I lived, it was rare to catch one ride straight though. Most people would pick me up in one little town and tell me they were only going to the next little town. That was okay with me, the variety of people who where willing to pick up a teenage hitch hiker was always interesting. They were mostly working people, and I imagine, knew what life was like without a car.

I had hitched rides since I was a kid. Living in the country, it made for more play time if I could catch a ride to my friends homes who lived a mile or two away. Some drivers were a little strange, and maybe had strange ideas, but I never had any problems even as a kid. I always thought hitching rides was fun, and a cheap easy way to get around. That was a long time ago…

One night hitching home from college stands out in my mind. I could not leave as early as I wanted to. I left around dinner time which is a bad time to catch a ride in rural areas as most people were eating dinner. I walked about two miles before I caught my first ride.

My first ride was a good one, they took me about twenty five miles before they arrived where they were going. I thought it would be a quick trip. Catch another ride, and most of the trip would be over. I did not plan on the weather though.

As I walked along putting my thumb out when cars were heading in my direction, it became cloudy and dark. The sun had gone down. That was not a problem normally, but this night the clouds blocked out any light from the moon and stars. The lack of starlight at least made it very dark.

A mile later and three cars later, I was still walking, and it started to rain. Of course being a footloose college kid, I had no rain jacket. Because it was early fall, the rain was not warm. I walked nine more miles being passed by a number of cars which either did not see me, or did not want to pick up a soggy rider, and get their car all wet.

By this time I was getting tired and the rain was really coming down. A car came up from behind me, slowed and pulled over. I thought at last I have a ride! The car had out of state plates so I figured it was a salesman. They were good company. I sloshed up to the car, and opened the door.

He took one look at me and said, “You are all wet!” I said, “Yes, of course, I walked the last nine miles.” He said, “Well I can’t let you in, please close the door.” What could I do but close the door and watch him drive off, leaving me behind.

I became angry. I was tired, hungry, and getting cold. I railed against the weather. I yelled about how much walking I had done. I yelled, and then yelled some more. Then I stopped yelling. In the midst of my yelling, I realized there was no one listening. There was also no one to blame for my predicament but myself, and besides myself, there was no one out there on the empty highway to care.

I resigned myself to walking the rest of the night, and let my anger go, as it was not accomplishing anything. Less than a minute later, a car pulled over and dropped me off within a few minutes walking time of my house. Such is life.

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Your life in your time

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I remember as a teenager wanting an identity of my own, rather than being my parents child. I used to set out on long weekends away from home looking for me and who I was. I would camp out at the lake, or by streams and rivers fishing and looking for me.

I never did find myself which at the time was frustrating for me. I thought once I was physically away from home finding out who I was would be an easy matter. After all anyone I was likely to meet or talk to would have no idea who my parents were, and should have a clear idea of who I was.

All these years later, I know now, that what I was doing was writing the story of my life. It was not out there for me to find, but rather there was a large empty blackboard waiting for me to fill. Who I ‘was’ is a lifetime of living and discovery.

Of all things that appeal to us, the first sought after are usually not the best for us. The best we can become take some searching and planning. I discovered a few things that may be of interest to you in the process of finding me.

Of the many things I have become, a few of them should not happen until their time. Getting married and having children are two that come to mind rather quickly. Many of us want to get married and we want to have children. That is the way we are, at least we want the try to have children part.

Getting married and having children though should be a farther along the road of becoming who we are rather than an early life goal. It is pretty difficult to become a parent and raise a family when we have not given ourselves a chance to discover who we are.

Other things should be done as soon as possible. For example, going to college or traveling across the country should be early life goals. College has obvious benefits and should be completed before life gets complicated. The same goes for wanting to strike out on our own or do some traveling. Traveling is much easier when there are no other responsibilities in our life.

Some things should be avoided all together. There are some roads where one should not venture when creating our future us. These are determined by what we think and feel, and vary from person to person. What is okay for one, is not okay for a second person.

Don’t be afraid to take reasonable risks. Because our life is basically empty until we start living it, taking risk is part of the process of defining who we are. Doing something you have never done before can lead to new friendships and interests. Be careful and make sure that what you are about to do is something you can tell your parents you are doing. It is a long lifetime, and it is easy to do something starting out in life that is regretted forever. The old saying, ‘look before you leap’, applies. Some new adventures can put you in a wheelchair or prison, or worse for life. Think long and hard before you act.

Don’t be afraid to make mistakes when you are finding you. If you are not making mistakes, you may not be reaching far enough. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, just make sure the mistakes you could make, do not harm yourself or others.

As I was out there making my own mistakes, and trying out new things, and discarding things that no longer worked for me, somewhere along the line I found myself. I found out who I am, and clarified my likes and dislikes. I learned what I wanted from my life.

Who you become is who you become. It takes time to create your life, and if you find it is not working for you, it will take time to change your life again. It is not possible to change who you are overnight. It is not possible to write the complete book of your life and who you are until the final page is written. Until then we are on a sometimes rambling journey down the path of life.

Enjoy where you are at in your journey and make the most of it, the next chapter will start in it own time and rushing it does not speed the process up but only adds frustration. Enjoy today and tomorrow will take care of itself is a good though to end on.

Happy New Year, happy new life!

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Good sense or no cents?

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I do not know if you are a Craiglist watcher, or you happen to peruse any other boards where items are sold or traded. As people are being pressed for cash they are selling items they know they can live without. One poster on Craiglist recently placed an ad to sell a weight machine.

The seller was claiming they have three horses to feed and it is either sell the weight machine, or eat one of the horses. I thought that was a good motivator for a certain group of perspective buyers who may otherwise have no interest in buying a weight machine? They may feel compelled to save a horse from becoming Sunday dinner….

Back in the early-seventies, I lived in a very rural area. That part of the country and perhaps the whole country was experiencing hard times almost like now, though not quite as bad. I lived in farm country and one would think life was easier there, but it was not. Truck and farm machinery still broke, cows became ill, and other problems arose from time to time all draining most farmers cash reserves.

One neighboring farmer wanted to butcher a horse to eat. He could not afford to eat one of his own cows, but the horse added little to the income side of the balance sheet. His wife of course was dead set against eating horse meat. It just was not done, and no one could remember eating horse meat since World War II, when it was horse meat, or no meat.

Contrary to popular city beliefs, most farmers are pretty sharp. You have to be on your toes to compete with modern massive farms and not starve in the process. What was the farmer to do? He sold the horse to his friend – also a farmer who lived down the road. He did not get a lot for the horse, only $175.00, which is equal to about $500.00 in today’s dollars. The sale of the horse was hardly a major money windfall.

Lo and behold less than four hours after they loaded up the horse and moved it to its new home, the farmer received a phone call. Somehow the horse had managed to strangle itself, and the buyer wanted his money back. What a dismal position for both farmers’! One has a useless dead horse and the other sold a presumably stupid horse that killed itself, just when they needed money so badly.

There was only one thing to do in the seller’s eyes. To make everything right he took the dead horse back, and gave his farmer friend his money back. Of course there was a silver lining in this cloud hanging over their heads. The horse was dead of unnatural causes and was completely edible. Nothing left to do but make the best of a bad situation.

The farmer who sold the horse that was now dead, against his wife’s wishes, butchered the dead horse. The wife temporarily became a non meat eater, at least no horsemeat, and the kids had meat to eat as they were young and did not make the connection.

Going back to where I started talking about selling things when times are tough, use good sense about what you buy when times are good. When things get tough, that three hundred dollar driver is worth about thirty dollars. That one thousand dollar weight set will be lucky to bring hundred. If needy sellers of now used items now facing tough times made wise purchases which retain or increase in value during any economic situation, they would not be so financially strapped. It is easier to take a few dollar loss or maybe even make a profit on something that retains it’s value than it is to sell something that was not really worth the original price to start with.

Feeling a little hungry? Your neighbor may have a little extra meat standing around…just kidding.

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