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Stop Being Shy – Only If You Want To 2 of 2

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Now that you are used to making comments on blogs and other articles you have read, share them with your friends. Speak to or email one or more of your ‘safe’ friends, and share the link to what you read and what you feel about it.

Emailing someone is safe, and sharing your opinion is only a little step from making comments somewhere where no one knows you, so it is also safe. You also want to keep reading and commenting on what you read at least once every day. Reading and commenting is the foundation stone of your process of overcoming shyness. You may want to slip back to where you are most comfortable because it is easy, but do not allow yourself to do this, keep moving forward.

You should be doing two things every day now, reading and commenting. Reading something on the web, commenting on it, and emailing your friends about what  you read with a link, and how you feel about it.

Once you are comfortable doing this it is time add another step. This step is only a small step from commenting on posts and articles and emailing your friends about what you read still including a link. In fact it is a safe way of combining both tasks.  Your next step is find forums you have an interest in and join them.

Forums are everywhere and most are easy to participate in. Some forum examples are Craigslist, which some feel is more of a zoo than a forum. Other possibilities are forums on computers, gardening, hiking, bicycling, personal development, the list in endless. Both Yahoo, and Google have groups you can become a member of on hundreds of  subjects.

All you have to do is sign up and start participating. Groups are a great next step because you are a little less anonymous yet you are still largely unknown by anyone other than comments and thoughts you contribute to the forum.

While you are participating in your group, do not let your commenting on what you read on the web and sharing it with friends fall to the wayside. You need to keep at it until it becomes habit and you do not even have to think about it any more.

If you have done these things faithfully for a month or so, they should be pretty much ingrained in you by now, and you can proceed to the next level. This marks a change from interacting on the web. You will be using your new found skills and abilities to interacting with real people in real time. For this step you will need to be a little adventurous and creative. Check out Craigslist, Yahoo, and search the web for groups that meet where you live that you have an interest in and can join and contribute.

Any group you join does not need to be something you have burning passion for, but it does need to be a group which you can enjoy and participate in. The value of moving your skills from the web to the world, is you are now starting to make the change in yourself with real live human beings. The time and effort you have put into the web have given you a new skill set you may have never used, or became rusty. Now being part of a group, you can talk, debate, contribute, or debate with some modicum of distance between you and those around you.

After you have spent enough time in a group environment where you have honed your skills, and you have accomplished what you set out to do. You are no longer shy, unless you choose to be and you now have good skills to talk to anyone about anything, anytime.

Now you have experienced that worst that can happen face to face in a safe environment of the web. You have been disagreed with, argued with, ignored, and everything else people do when interacting with one another. You also have been agreed with, quoted, asked for your opinion, and started new conversations. You have been a part of most of the worst and most of the best of not being shy. The rest is up to you now. Good luck, and I hope you are happy with the changes you have made.

Stop Being Shy – Only If You Want To 1 of  2

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Stop Being Shy – Only If You Want To 1 of 2

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If you are one of the many people who want to change yourself from someone who feels they are too shy to someone more outgoing I have a few ideas that may help you. Of course on the downside is you are the person who has to do the work. At first changing will be work that drains you emotionally, and perhaps physically. Once you get into the changing habit  those feelings will go away. You will begin to notice not being shy is not so difficult after all.

You have to really want to quit being shy to be successful. It is almost the same as learning a new subject in school, or learning a new job. If you want to be successful, understand success comes from within, not from anything you can read, listen too or watch. If you really want to change from being what you feel is being to shy read on. Otherwise you may as well find something else to read, as the rest of this post will be of little help for you other than a few pointers you may never use.

As you are still reading, here is the first task you want to accomplish on your path from changing from being shy to being more outgoing. You need to to decide what the worst is that could happen from changing from being shy into being more outgoing. Sometimes we prefer to be shy because it is safer, easier, or less stressful. Your reasons for being shy may include these reasons and more, and your reasons may be different.

No matter what your reasons are ensure you really understand what you are getting out of being shy. The reason for identifying the important  reasons you choose to be shy are important. After thinking about yourself and what you get out of being shy, you may decide that you really are enjoying quite a few benefits from being shy. You may find that being shy is comfortable, and now that you really looked at it you no longer feel any need to be something else, and shyness fits you quite well after all.

Heroine of Austin, TexasThink about all the reasons you want to not be so shy, and be more outgoing. Your reasons may be: you want to be more popular, you want to be noticed, you want to be able to talk to people. Spend as much time on this task as you did on your reasons for being shy. The purpose of these examinations of what you are getting and what you expect may cancel each other out. You may decide changing is more work than what you think will change.

I am going to proceed on the idea that after you have compared yourself now against you in the future, you decided you really want to change into someone more outgoing. I have one last task that you have to complete before you start on the process of changing yourself, sort of a sanity check to ensure you are making a good choice. I mention this because like all change this process takes a lot of time and effort on your part.

This last task is you need to define what is the worst that happen if you stay shy as you are. I am sure you are the perfect you right now, though you feel you can improve on you, and make yourself better. Next think about the worst that can happen if you quit being shy and expose more of yourself to the world around you. What is the worst that can come of not being shy?

Now, we are on to the actual process itself. The first step in moving away from shyness is like swimming in cold water. Taking little steps until you are sure you are ready to jump in and get it over with. While it seems simple to just make the change all at once, it is not the best way because too many things will have changed too fast, and that will take you way out of your comfort zone. Get too far out of your comfort zone and you will not want to stay there. We will be taking small steps instead.

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