Plugged in and Separated

‘The Offspring’ with their song, “Keep ‘em Separated”, has a much deeper meaning than they may have realized when they wrote it.

One of the most searched for posts on my blog is by people who for one reason or another find themselves on the outside of their life looking in. I am guessing the reasons are as varied as the people themselves, this feeling of being lost in our life is something we share in numbers unheard of before the electronic world arrived.

I have heard the newest generation of young adults being called the, “Plugged In Generation”. Plugged into what exactly, is what I wonder when I strike up a conversation with one as we are both sitting around waiting for something. They all seem to have cell phones which double as high tech pagers, and triple as portable computers albeit with software directed towards being even more connected.

I open a conversation with a general observation, perhaps followed by another observation. Some people reply back, others pretend they did not hear me, or think I am talking to someone else even though we are the only two people present. Their conversation is stuttered, not in their speech but in managing to put together a reply that is more than the length of a quick text message.

Within a few minutes they go back to being engrossed in their cell phones, either hoping someone will text them, or texting someone with some witty overused string of words. To me they look lonely and lost. They appear to be missing some basic ideas that I always took for granted. Things like growing up in a household where there was real conversation, and not life scheduling. Family time where everyone did something together, even if that something was eating hot dogs and chips in the back yard together with no interruption.

Many people are finding themselves isolated through technology. If they are the ‘Plugged In Generation’, what exactly are they plugged into? Parents whose interaction with them is via text messaging? Friends who post inane messages on their social web site accounts, siblings who prefer the aloofness of electronic strangers, rather than the company of family members.

Living a socially satisfying life not created by electronic media is sometimes awkward. Conversations do not go as planned. Questions and answers are not crafted, drafted, and polished. Sometimes questions and answers are about two different perspectives of the same situation.

The world of the plugged in does not have to deal with these awkward moments, testy conversation, or uncomfortable moments. Everyone is their best friend, and their Parents monitor them from a distance.

The downside is their is no flesh and blood anyone to talk with, no Parent to spend time with, and no unscripted conversations.

With all this going on, it is no surprise so many people feel lost in their own lives. Look around at the artificial world we live in. Food is crafted to taste good with enough variety one rarely has to eat anything that is not the favorite food of the week. Music, and other electronic entertainment have evolved to a point where one never need listen or hear anything they do not wish to.

For all the benefit of being a part of the plugged in generation, the searches relating to being lost in life is no surprise. I understand some of what is missing in peoples lives these days. I think it was really brought to light for me when I met Helen, who I wrote about a few posts previous. Helen whose idea of ‘plugged i’n is over the air television, told me on afternoon how nice it was to find someone she could talk to about things important in her life.

It would be wonderful if each time my blog was searched by someone feeling lost in their life, I could pick up a phone, drive a car, take a flight and speak with them. One human being talking with another about the feeling of being a stranger in your own life and how to fix it. Instead I write a some words with the sincere hope that the someone on the other end, reads my words and gets enough out of my post to help them find meaning in their life. Along with making a difference in the lives of their family, friends, and better their community along the way. Instead all I can do is write. We are human beings, not advertising machines whose life is crafted funny replies to unimportant questions.

Talk face to face with your family and friends. Listen to different types of music. When you are outside let your ears hear what is happening around you. Quit living in your head, and start living in the world around you. Doing these few things, you will probably find others who feel like you do, and make real friends, have real conversations, and have awkward moments. Along the way you will become part of your live again.

For the curious, check out the Categories section to the left, there are more posts on feeling alone and lost.

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